HitlerCities is proud to provide what is claimed to be a 'free' home page and email service at the expense of our members, sitting back on comfy chairs while their sweat & toil brings in advertising money. Please visit one or more of our moneymakers today.
Please note: This page is intended for advertisers NOT homesteaders. HitlerCities members, a special advertising info page has been provided for you.
With over 2.5 million unpaid employees writing content for us, HitlerCities
is the biggest, most wildly liked by everybody* site on the Web! So you
will no doubt want, no, need to advertise here. Our advertising
options include several ways to blat your annoying, obtrusive and potentially
hazardous advertisement on our servants' unsuspecting little Web sites:
GeoPlop CrashAds are a nifty way to say ""
loud and clear to your target audience. They pop up in the user's face
and are guaranteed to stay popped up for a while, because if the victim,
err, viewer tries to close it before it has fully loaded, their computer
will crash and your ad will remain frozen on-screen until they reboot.
Don't worry about viewers trying to get around them by turning off their
GeoThornInYourSide banners, 320x468-pixel CASIE standard server-include
banners that our servants foolishly think are there to help them (we said
they were 'navigation' banners, and those stupid minions believed it! :-o)
are a gaudy and annoying way to advertise whatever it is you want to advertise.
Several varieties are available for varying fees, including Static (booor-ing!),
Mildly Annoying (Animated, 24KB avg.), Hyperactive-Flashing, Hyperactive-Flashing
with embedded subliminal message of your choosing, and our most heavily
animated "Epileptic's Nightmare".
Click here to see a live demonstration of our Watermark!
HitlerCities member e-mail address lists
Lists of anywhere from hundreds to millions of members' email addresses
HitlerCities is very flexible in spamming its victims with newer and
more intrusive and deceptive ads. We are always at work digging up and
gathering personal, private information on each of our users and we expect
Current devious plans include BannerForms, banners that are disguised
as inputs, listboxes and search boxes but are actually advertisements that
will whisk the unsuspecting schmuck to your products page!, and the bigger,
better CrashAd II that pops up fullscreen and is coded to remove the 'x'
Close button (so the viewer has to restart the computer to close them),
and bandwidth-gobbling AudioAds embedded in member
pages--You don't have to just assault them to their face, now you can yell
at them too!
* As evidenced by counting
the number of criticism- or anti-HitlerCities pages on the Web. If you
find one, please let us know because that means our GeoStapo and Trademark
Enforcers are sleeping on the job, and the offending site's webmaster will
have to be strong-armed immediately to get it nuked. If nuking critics'
sites sounds like fun, please apply for the fulltime job!
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