| Woohoo!HitlerCities
Merger Info |
As you all probably know, HitlerCities
has merged with WooHoo! Corporation. This was not a "sell-out". Our lawyers
are working hard to squelch that blasphemous rumor even as we speak. Meanwhile,
you're probably asking "Why did you sel..er, merger with WooHoo! Corporation
in the first place?"
The answer: We did it all for you, this was done
simply for homesteader benefit. This was a decision that makes your homepages
a whole lot better, makes the server run faster, gives you kewl new features...
OK, you're not buying this load of crap, are you...
The real reason is WooHoo! wants to become a world
dominating power, become the top #1 website on the Internet and sell shitloads
and shitloads of banner ads and become filthy rich like Bill Gates...except,
how is it going to get all that traffic? Simple--since it has an incredibly
hard time getting traffic on its own, it will buy a whole bunch of these
nameless portal sites, which ARE getting lots of traffic, assimilate them
into itself--that's what they're doing, buying traffic--and use the increase
in ad money to buy another, and another....
"But", you ask, "what about our webpages?" We've
got surprises for you there, too. Face it, your crappy homepages are worthless...
but the traffic they draw in from the search engines is immeasurably valuable!
We don't want you to be mad at us for taking over
the copyrights to all your sites and selling them to WooHoo!. So, we are
giving you many new and improved Services to pacify you. (These include
our new AdScare, Porn Banners and the ever-popular Pages That Suck program.)
Thank you for making WooHoo!HitlerCities very,
very rich! a part of your Internet experience. |
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