THE HITLERCITIES WORLD REPORT
Vol 5. No. 2
IN THIS ISSUE:
We Sell Out To Woohoo!
Quit Saying "My Page"! It's Not Yours Anymore
GeoForums Are Dead!
Whose Guestbook Is That?
Oh, Jeez...
The Watermark Is Gone!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
WE SELL OUT TO WOOHOO!
Yes, we have done it for you once again (please pat
us on the back with your financial donations), sold out! We, and now you,
are currently owned by the Woohoo Corporation. Its strong alliances with
AOL make it a prime partner for us (because they know how to censor). Because
of the details of the merger, we've had to lay off about 200 employees,
2/3 of our workforce. But don't worry! We only fired the unimportant personnel
we didn't really need, like tech support and the guys responsible for backups
and other useless stuff. All our most important personnel, the lawyers
and Trademark Enforcers, are still here.
Also due to the details of this merger, you have
to go to Woohoo!s website and re-signup your account. Woohoo! currently
has millions of members, so your username is probably already taken and
you will have to change your username, email address, URL etc. upon rejoining...tough
shit! Your new username will have .geo tacked onto the end, so if it was
ilove it's now ilove.geo. Isn't that sweet. You also may want to check
out the changes they've made to our TOS....
QUIT SAYING "MY PAGE"! IT'S NOT YOURS ANYMORE
Please note that you must accept the new TOS or your
site will be deleted. It grants HitlerCities and Woohoo! the perpetual,
irrevocable, etc. copyrights to your site and everything on it. Any piece
of content you've uploaded at one time or another, or ever will, becomes
our intellectual property forever. This means in theory we could take anything
on your site, sell it to the highest bidder, then forbid you from ever
using your own material because that would be infringing on OUR copyrights!
But we..uh..won't, because we're...um..responsible like that. (Pleeeze
start posting more of your unpublished books online!)
And as always, if you don't like it, tough shit!
Also note that since we now own your content, you are forbidden from moving
out and posting it on another server and will be sued for copyright infringement
if you do. Once again, thank you for doing business with HitlerCities.
GEOFORUMS ARE DEAD!
Due to our overwhelming need to appear successful,
we've removed our publicly-accessible public opinion forum and replaced
it with a new Woohoo! forum that must be signed into with your HitlerCities
username and password. You of course know what this means, that your username
will be attached to any public statement you make, which will make it easier
for us to track down those who post statements critical of us and take
the appropriate disciplinary actions against them. Bear in mind that the
TOS forbids doing anything "unsupportive" of us or our sponsors, such as
complaining or criticizing, getting the Better Business Bureau involved,
etc. Think carefully before you write!
WHOSE GUESTBOOK IS THAT!?
Due to an overwhelming number of users abusing the
system, we are now actively enforcing our No Outside Guestbooks policy.
Those users wishing to have a guestbook on their site MUST use a Geobook
or face the consequences. Illegal guestbooks for HitlerCities members include
but are not limited to Guestworld, Dreambooks, Cowar--er..Bravenet, XOOMbooks
or anything else which is not a Geobook. Remember that any other outside
services, such as counters, URL redirectors or message boards are also
expressly forbidden. Violators are subject to account deletion and possible
legal action.
OH, JEEZ...
Once again, someone has made a critical public-opinion
statement on our new Woohoo! forum. They had the nerve to protest the fact
that the copyrights to all member sites now belong to us. When will you
people learn? As always, the person(s) responsible have been taken care
of.
(PS. Remember, that Woohoo! will give out your IP
address to anyone who asks for it, court order or no court order!)
THE WATERMARK IS GONE!
As bait to all our prospective new members from Woohoo!,
we have removed the Watermark from all of our member pages. It will be
reinstated once enough Woohoo! members have been suckered in, because everyone
knows only newbie losers with no content (for us to copyright) will sign
up someplace with a Watermark. But don't worry! The Watermark you all know
and love is being updated at this very moment, to make it even more jumpy
and intrusive! You knew we wouldn't let you down.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
STUFF YOU NEED TO KNOW
Want to read our new TOS and find out you're signing
your life away if you accept it? Jump to <TOS page>.
Want to complain about something? Go <away>.
Want to be remembered as an unfortunate mishap involving
accidental nuclear warhead detonation? Criticise us on our new non-public
<public-opinion forums>. Go ahead, we dare
ya!
Want to hire a copyright lawyer to try and get your
content back? Good luck! We sponsor all of them!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
HitlerCities
You Are Why We Are Here
http://thor.prohosting.com/~hitler/