Welcome to the Graveyard

where old, shitty pages go to die...

Dont'cha hate it when you get around to cleaning up, and you end up with a boxful of absolute crap but you just can't bring yourself to throw any of it away? This is that dark corner of the basement where I put that box of stuff; I feel it necessary to give elements of my wonderful (hah!) website a proper burial (not just the Delete key)...
 
 
The Many Faces of Snicker

Yup, this site's old as dirt. So there have been a number of remodels and facelifts to the site since its creation. Here are all the copies of index.htm I've managed to find tucked away on my hard drive (e.g. renamed the old one, 'just in case', and forgot to delete it)...obviously, saving or posting every version would take up all my space and make you, my loyal subject, very bored very quickly. I'm doing this because of all the people who asked, "Well, then what did the OLD one look like?" when I asked on one revamped index.htm, "How do you like the new look?" or whatever. 

Here's the oldest one I could find, close to how the original index looked (Back on GeoShitties)

How things were just before I (then, "we") were bitched out by Geocities admin for the GeoPop Page

Post-bitchout move-out notice on Geo

First index in my Netcom fortress

Other stuff that doth bite the dust...

The Official LTHS Fry Report (updated daily)  ...Daily? Hah! Updated every few days to a week, if I feeled like it. But the Fry Report is no more, since I'll be spending the next 4 years in Indiana (Tri-State Univ.) and won't be anywhere near those nasty, nasty LT french fries. Oh yeah, and this is the one and only page on my site that ever ended with .html (except the ".htmL files are evil!" redirector that bumps anyone looking for index.htmL to index.htm ....)

Newsroom  ...Full of "all the news that's printed to fit"...mostly attempts to point fun at Microsoft, Intel and other biggies that could get very pissy if they found that page. But I'm sick of digging around for news, and besides, there's no way I can report on *some* events and not others (lacking an AP wire in my living room I have to nab this stuff off TV and newsgroups and such) and still call myself a journalist. (Okay, I do that just to boost my ego...) This page also had a bunch of my conspiracy theories on it, and those I actually felt like saving...<Whump!> The Newsroom portion gets slam-dunked into the box...
 

Cookie Security Demo  ...Written during the heydey of cookie blockers, the cookies.txt directory and the myriad hullabaloo of complaints that cookies were invasions of privacy, etc, this page summed up everybody's visits to the main pages of the site, and inferred some info about them from the hit-counts (just like a slimy, cookie-using real live marketer would do...) It also displayed some other nifty information, including the surfer's IP address, last site visited and sometimes even their full, real name. Unfortunately, hardly anyone dug down far enough to get there, and I ended up getting more complaints about having to put up with those cookie warnings (3.x browsers) than about how kewl the cookie page was. And anyway, now that 4.x browsers can disable all cookies transparently it's a bit of a moot point...
(subpage: Horny International)

That Really Pisses Me Off!  ...Page that was supposed to be for griping and complaining about stuff, like the  PissedOff Forum, but nobody ever bothered to gripe and complain on it! So into the box it went...

Jokes Page (and sub-page, Mr. Doyle's Groaners)
 ...One of the first ever pages on the site (one of the original 4 pages, back during the early Geocities days <sniff> ah, the memories! of 'Under Construction' graphics and desperately trying to makes Frames work, then saying 'f--- it' and making more pages instead...), where I found a bunch of bad Windows jokes and top-ten lists and stuck them there. But it was really a sucky page (just like the 2.3 billion other computer joke pages out there), I didn't bother to update it and hardly anybody sent stuff to put on it...<Whump!> In the box. Mr. Doyle was a US history teacher for my senior year of high school, known for his notoriously ancient, outdated and generally not-funny, *clean* jokes. A bunch of them are archived there. But I'm not a lowly high-schooler any more :), and besides, who would want to read a page of bad jokes anyway? <Whump!>

Links Page  ...Full of excellent links, hand-picked from every corner of the Web. But....there are too many excellent sites to link to! It's driving me mad! (...foams at mouth...) Besides, I don't feel like checking for dead links. (yeah, I know, you're thinking, "What a lazy son-of-a-Gun!") Weeeelll, I do have another sort of links section, it's for Geocities victims....

SpamBack ....This was at one time a rudimentary spammer-revenge tool. It was seldom used, and eventually, updating my browser/mail/account meant I could no longer run the SpamBack script on my incoming mailfile. I was too lazy/poor to update SpamBack (e.g. Perl script), and decided to trash it. (Eventually, such a tool would be used for unmitigated evil anyway, and get ME in all sorts of trouble!)

Search Engine Spy
This page containted an applet that displayed the top search queries on WebCrawler in a scrolling ticker. Unfortunately, this applet no longer exists on WebCrawler, so this page is kinda useless. Included here for reference only.